THE MEANING OF LIFE ON WARIA LIVING WITH HIV/AIDS (HUMAN IMMUNODEFICIENCY VIRUS/ACQUIRED IMMUNE DEFICIENCY): A PHENOMENOLOGICAL STUDY

Nur Amin Barokah Asfari
Ms., Universitas Gadjah Mada, Indonesia, nur.amin.b@mail.ugm.ac.id

Abstract
The existence of waria (a melding of two Indonesian words: wanita (woman) and pria (man) has not been recognized in some places, including in Indonesia. As the third-gender community, they often get discrimination from their surroundings. Therefore, they tend to limit their interaction with others, outside their community. Some of them work as sex workers. So, they are vulnerable to be infected with HIV/AIDS.  Waria who is living with HIV/AIDS will feel meaningless at the first time. Sometimes, they chose to give up and end their lives. However, some of them become HIV/AIDS survivors. Those who have a purpose in their life will be more motivated to continue their lives better. Frankl found that the meaning of life is very important to one's life. It can be realized in a desire to be a useful person for others (Bastaman, 2007). It is a qualitative study with phenomenology approach. It aims to understand the process to find the meaning of live on waria living with HIV/AIDS. A subject was involved in this study with characteristics: were transsexual and positively infected with HIV/AIDS. The participant will be interviewed about her experiences to find her meaning of life. The results showed that she has meaningless phases when knowing that she had HIV/AIDS at first. She had time to give up. She felt her life would be end soon. But, after reflecting, she thought that she had to use her time to repent. She regretted all her mistakes in the past. She hoped that God would forgive her. She wanted to be a better person. Then, she began to change her attitude better. She was committed to her meaning of life and directed all her activities to achieve it She became more religious and had more prosocial behaviors. For ten years, she worked as a volunteer for people with HIV/AIDS, especially for waria in Yogyakarta. She was satisfied with her life now and felt herself more valuable because she could be a useful person to others.

Keywords: the meaning of life, waria, HIV/AIDS, phenomenological study